Kind Note from Reader #4

I am pleased to share the following email from a kind and thoughtful reader.  I have no idea if it is original prose or not.  But, he is kind enough to send such missives in response to some of my postings, so I like to share them with the other readers. 

... blessings...
... and peace to you...
... sir...
... in this holiday season...
... and while i am not...
... completely sure...
... stages of movement...
... through space...
... are worthy of celebration...
... on their own accord...
... i do hope whate'er...
... celebrations...
... you have...
... are free from discord...
... bringing you together...
... in joy...
... with those you love...
be well.
laeth

I wish I had a way with words as does laeth.  

At least, that is what THIS DADDY thinks.

You Go Girl!

Okay, so I am one of the guys who always claims to prefer 'butch' boys.  Yet, the love of my life was what I call, 'softly masculine.'  So I was thrilled to find the following article:



The Strength in Being a Feminine Gay Man

Tyler Curry
Freelance columnist and fiction writer; creator, The Needle Prick Project

Posted: 10/01/2013 6:53 pm

As the mainstream image of what a gay man is continues to morph into more of a hero and less of a victim, we continue to cast our most handsome, athletic and masculine men in the leading roles of the gay movement. As our rainbow fades to pastel, society now understands that gay men can be just like the rest of mainstream society. Our community has a new cast of gay heroes who place our most chiseled, scruffy-jawlined faces forward for everyone to see. From TV stars like Wentworth Miller to athletes like Jason Collins, the world now knows that we can be strong and manly and fit right in with the rest of the boys. But there is a different kind of strength that has always existed within gay culture, although it might not come in the form of bulging muscles and bass voices.

Unlike his masculine counterpart, the effeminate gay man doesn't have the luxury of hiding behind a butch façade until he is comfortable with coming out of the closet. You know the type. He can learn the choreography to the latest pop song more quickly than you can learn the lyrics. In high school he had to make a beeline for his car the minute the bell rang so that he could avoid the worn-out name calling, bullying or even violence. The Bedazzler was, is, and always will be his best childhood friend. Yes, these queeny gays may have been born with a serious masculinity deficiency, but that is exactly what makes them the epitome of strength.

As someone who has always straddled the masculine/feminine divide, I desperately sought to play up my butch qualities and minimize my fairy wings as much as humanly possible. Thankfully I excelled at sports and had a muscular build and a sort of generic, all-American-white-boy appeal -- until I opened my mouth, of course. I sounded more like a chipmunk with a lisp than the boy who'd just made the saving play on the soccer field. Eventually it was the only thing that people noticed.
Even after I accepted my sexuality, I struggled with my femininity. I spent hours in the gym, building my body in an effort to emulate the ideal of what men supposedly should look like. I stopped applying my coveted bronzer and shaved my head like a G.I. Joe. I even opted for a more understated wardrobe over the tight, bright T-shirts that I secretly loved. But the nasal voice and extra bounce in my step were inescapable. No matter what I tried, I always received degrading comments and snickers about my disposition, but not from the straight community. These came from gay men.
A girl can only take so much. I have learned to embrace and enjoy my feminine qualities just as much as my masculine ones. If masculinity is paramount, something that all men must strive for to be considered "real" men, then gay men, by definition, will always be considered lesser than their straight counterparts. We gay men know that there isn't one definition of what a "real" man is. Hell, we are living proof. So discounting or stifling any feminine characteristics that we may have is a slap in the face of our own culture and an admission to others that there is something to suppress. The gay men who couldn't help but shoot glitter out of every orifice were the ones who propelled gay rights into the mainstream. As we get closer to becoming fully integrated in the larger society, it is important that we not allow any segment of our own community to suffer in the process.

The measure of a gay man's femininity in a heteronormative society is much like the measure of an African American's skin color in a society of white privilege. The most feminine of gay men are the equivalent of the darkest-skinned of African Americans, while the gay men who exhibit the most masculine qualities enjoy privileges like fair-skinned African Americans do. These phenomena are the result of expectations placed on both groups by segments of society who demand that we be like them. Those who fail these litmus tests are least valued by the ruling party. As proud gay men, we should demand within our own community that masculinity not be an indicator of worth, and that we respect each other regardless of our differences.

To the queens who have been beaten up, marginalized and mangled for refusing to cave in to the norm, you are the true heroes of the gay movement. It is these men to whom we owe our freedom to be the exact type of gay man that we were made to be, and nothing else.

So even with my nasal voice and knack for choreography, I realize that I am as much of a boy as I need to be, and as much of a girl as I want to be. That is strength.

Snap.

By being male, you are by definition, 'masculine.'  You may fall a bit on the 'softer' side of the masculinity scale...but masculine you are, like it or not.



At least, that is what THIS DADDY thinks.

The Voice of Poland - Kamila Apryas - „Dude (Looks Like a Lady)"

VoiceOfPolandTVP

You Know You Are Getting Old When.....

Not long ago (Sunday, April 22, 2012) in a posting entitled, "Younger Than Spring Time..."

I wrote about how and by whom I was 'imprinted' with regards to the type of guy it is to whom I am attracted.

As I wrote at the time, "John Kerr was an actor who played, " 2LT Joseph Cable, USMC " in the movie version of, "South Pacific". Tall, slender, almost slight, at an early age (7 perhaps) I know he made my 'fun parts' tingle. After seeing him wonder around shirtless and barefoot, then making love' to Liat (a beautiful, Pacific Islander girl played by, France Nuyen), I was hooked."

Well, my 'imprinter' recently passed away (John Kerr Obituary).  Maybe I am weird, but learning that Mr. Kerr had died has added to the log pile of occurrences making me more acutely aware of my mortality.  Sigh, getting old is not for weak of heart.

I never got to meet Mr. Kerr in person and, as you can read in his Wikipedia entry or his IMDB posting, he hasn't led a public life in many years. I wonder, had I been able to meet him how he would have felt at being informed of the lasting effect he had on me.  Funny isn't it, how some of the most insignificant things that we do sometimes have major impacts on others, without even knowing what we've done or even that we've made any impact at all.

As I wrote at the time, there are times that I wish I'd imprinted on someone else.  It is the orthodoxy, at least here in Seattle, that a short, stocky, hairy, older is only allowed to be attracted to others of his own type.  Well, right or wrong, for good or ill, I am stuck with an attraction to taller; lean, almost slight guys, with nice feet.  Instead of, "Damn you, John Kerr! Damn you to h*ll!," as I teasingly wrote in that earlier article, now I write seriously, "Thank you, John Kerr! Thank you all the way to heaven."  To me, you'll always be, "Younger than Spring Time."

At least, that is what, THIS DADDY thinks.

The classic 1958 Rogers & Hammerstein movie. Rights belong to MGM and 20th Century Fox and others. This video viewable everywhere except Germany.

Kind Note from a Reader #2

Once again, I received the following email from a kind and thoughtful reader.  I have no idea if it is original prose or not.  But, he was kind enough to send it in response to some of my postings, so I'd like to share it with the other readers.

 ... as the song is sung...
... "we are finding who we are"...
(king's x - impressive catalog)
... so who i am...
... is as oft unknown to me...
... as it is to you...
... though in this becoming...
... and unbecoming...
... perhaps we both...
... are better men now...
... than then...
... and if faith rewards...
... most excellent in character...
... in yon fore when...
... and i will pray your year...
... more wonderful...
... than you know mine shall be...
... and that you shall have...
... resilience...
... as you are full of "why"...
... and shall have...
... patience...
... as others are...
... and, of course...
... in addition to being...
... well read...
... and well laid...
... that you are...
... well loved...
blessings from the kingdom of the two seas.
laeth

Nice is as nice does.

At least, that is what THIS DADDY thinks.

My Song of the Sea

Moscrop choir 2009 spring concert

Civility is as Civility Does

December 8 at 6:14pm

... looking forward...
... to more good word...
... in your blog...
... pray you well...
... and if spirits fell...
... only into pools...
... of grace...
blessings.
laeth

I don't know who this, "laeth" fellow is...but by golly it is sure nice when I hear from him.  Not because he likes my blog, etc., but he just seems like an awfully nice fellow.  Sending nice thoughts to a stranger over the internet.  Wow, that is really different...usually it is just mean-spirited jabs sent by anonymous cyber thugs who glory in being able to attack folks without repercussion.

I hope that 2013 is a wonderful year for this laeth fellow.  In fact, I know it will be.

At least, that is what THIS DADDY thinks.

Strangers in the Night is a 1966 album by Frank Sinatra.
The album marked Sinatra's return to #1 on the pop album charts in the mid-1960s, and it consolidated the comeback he started in 1966.

Hypocracy is as Hypocracy Does

As you may know, Dan Savage is under attack for some anti-Christian comments he made recently. Whilst reading the, 'The Daily Beast' today, I came across an article entitled, "Is Dan Savage the Gay Santorum?" by Jay Michaelson.  http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2012/05/03/is-dan-savage-the-gay-santorum.html#comments

I read the Mr. Michaelson's article and found his perspective refreshing.  I did not, however, find many of the comments he received refreshing in the least. To answer his question, yes, Dan Savage is the gay Santorum. 

Below are my comments in response the flaming posts appearing in the, "Comments" section below the article:

Anyone who has known of Mr. Savage from the early days is not surprised by his comments.  His views, at least anecdotal to my experience here in Seattle, are shared by many younger gay, 'activists.'  I once walked out of a gay bingo event (back when that was cool) being held in a synagogue, ironically during an Easter weekend.  Mr. Savage was the MC and went on and on saying rude, denigrating things about Christians and Christianity.  It seems to be part of his ‘shtick.’  I have found him revolting ever since.  I had a similar experience while doing volunteer work with an AIDS organization in town.  A local progressive church had let our group use one of their rooms for a meeting/social event.  The hip, young, uber-politically gay folk immediately upon walking into the sanctuary, set up the bar on the alter (on the alter for heaven’s sake) and then spent the next 20 minutes or so making fun of Christians and Christianity, all the while knowing that I, one of the longest-serving volunteers and a church going man, was sitting there. These people were, I thought, my friends and comrades.  I was wrong.  I finally stood up, gave them hell and walked out, with them shaking their heads, still not getting about what it was that I was upset.  This sort of behavior would never, EVER occur in a similar setting in a mosque, or temple, or a synagogue.  It seems totally appropriate in the gay community to denigrate Christianity while remaining very sensitive and politically correct about other faiths.  I get it.  Christianity (well, more correctly uneducated Christians using the bible incorrectly) seems anti-gay.  I get it.  But really, is Islam or Judaism any more accepting?  No.  So why the hypocrisy, who knows?  I didn’t understand it then and I don’t understand it now.  This insistence on an anti-Christianity gay, ‘orthodoxy’ is ridiculous.  It just is. It does a great deal of damage the community’s reputation.  Nobody respects a hypocrite.  Mr. Savage is taking a pounding for preaching about tolerance and then being publicly and aggressively intolerant,.  That happens when one is a hypocrite.  The gay community does the same thing when holding Christianity in lower esteem than other religions.  You hear the expression sometimes in Christian churches, “Hate the sin, not the sinner.”  Perhaps in this context, it might be better to, “hate the Christian, not the Christianity.”  At least then you’d be giving that same kind of respect given to a belief system held by millions of people (gay and straight) around the world.  Which, agree with it or not, don’t  you think, just as do the others, it deserves?

At least, that is what THIS DADDY thinks.

 

THE WAILERS - HYPOCRITES/THANK YOU LORD

Uploaded by roaringlion87 on Jan 29, 2010

Luna Park 28/01

When Bob Marley returned to Jamaica from the United States in 1967, The Wailers started their own label, ‘Wail'n Soul'm’ records, and released their first independent single "Freedom Time" backed with "Bend Down Low." "Nice Time," "Hypocrites," "Mellow Mood," "Thank You Lord," and "Stir It Up" are all recorded in the same year.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stir_It_Up

 

Fashion: Ethan Shoshan

Fashion: Ethan Shoshan


Fashion : Ethan Shoshan

An interesting website. At least that is what THIS DADDY thinks.