I've often wondered. The older I get (and boy am I old, I turn 50 a month from now), it seems the younger the lads get. Having been back in the dating pool for over a year now (though at the shallowest end of the pool) the only guys from whom I receive any attention are guys young enough to be my son. Seriously, I get hit on by guys who are 20 or 21...there was even one young sailor, 19 years old, who expressed interest in getting into my pants.
Now, I prefer younger guys, of course, and Sam was 24 when we met (I was 46). But Sam is a special, 'young' man, so the vast age difference wasn't a real issue for us. He wasn't looking for a parent, he didn't want someone to 'take care' of him. He wanted to have sex with me because he found me sexy, not because I was 'nice' or 'stable', etc. It, the age difference, had ramifications, of course (he didn't want to introduce me as his boyfriend to some of his friends for fear they'd think it was too weird he was dating an old dude, his compulsion to move to Boston for graduate school because he 'had' to do so, etc.), but it (the age difference) didn't really have an impact on our day to day lives together. It didn't interfere. We were just as attracted to each other the day we parted as the day we met, we still loved being together, the sex was still fulfilling, etc. Those things said, though, I am more than willing and anxious to acknowledge that under most circumstances, a 22 year age difference (when the younger guy is in his 20's and the older one in his 40's) is not the best marker of a successful, long term relationship.
So, my question is: where are the hot guys in their late 20's to late 30's who were 'boys' at 21? Are they all taken? Are they no longer interesting in 'boying'? I can't figure it out. As I've written before, I think guys can continue to be boyish into their 40's. My ex (the one who lives 80 feet away from the little house on the Big Lake), at 45, is still quite boyish. I recently went on a date with a really hot Brazilian boy, aged 39 and he is very boyish...okay, he does have a bald spot, but still. He was boyish as all get out.
So, where do all the 'older' boys go? As someone approaching the big 50, I am acutely aware that my dating options, whether I like it or not, are dwindling. But, I still think I have a great deal to offer. I am a much better person than I was at 30 (ask Sam, he'll confirm it for you). I am calmer, more patient, much easier going. I have a nice home (messy and a bit down at heel, but still nice), a good job, a crazy dog, etc. One would think I'd be a hot commodity. Heck, if I was a straight guy, I'd have chicks crawling all over me.
I am not now, nor was I when I met Sam, expecting to have a 'serious' relationship with someone more than a generation younger than myself. It was a surprise to me that the best relationship I'd ever had was with someone so much younger and so different. But, as I said, that was a special case and Sam is a special young man. I am not living on pins and needles awaiting another hot 24 year old, with a hot ass, nice feet, who is a total bottom, and loves to call me, 'Daddy' during special intimate moments. If I was, I'd likely be setting myself up for disappointment. No matter what the age, finding a great love is hard.
Is it unrealistic to think that there are tall, skinny, bottom boys in their 30's, with nice feet and nice asses around? I shouldn't be. But for some odd reason I am finding it so.
At least, that is what THIS DADDY thinks.
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