You know, I use the internet a lot for both connecting and 'connecting', if you know what I mean. While I tend to visit the same cities over and over again (where I've established connections), sometimes I do visit new places. At the moment, I am at one of those new places. Not, I might add, a place I hope makes the list of places to which I will return.
Anyway, since I use the internet to meet people, I tend to use the same venues on which I chat to meet new people who live in the places to which I travel. I am starting to wonder why I bother. The flake quotient is extremely (and I do mean EXTREMELY high).
For example, one guy with whom I chatted wanted me to call him late, late at night before I arrived. When I explained that I am an old man, who was taught that you don't call before 10:00am or after 10:00pm, he got pissed off. When I arrived in this dismal place on business, I started work right away and worked for several days. After a few days, when I had the chance to check in via email, he got pissed off because I'd not contacted him immediately and that I didn't rearrange my entire work schedule to accommodate chatting or meeting him. Next there was a guy I chatted with, who when he IM'd me after I arrived, gave me grief because I'd left him 'hanging'. He'd somehow gotten the idea that we had specific plans to meet and was all upset that I'd led him on. Really? You chat with someone once, perhaps exchange a couple of emails, and you are engaged? That seemed to be his impression.
I just don't understand it. I know people are lonely and I know some people find dating and hooking up frustrating...but how can you leave someone 'hanging' to whom you've never even actually spoken? How can you expect someone to rearrange their entire schedule, especially when they are traveling on business, to make meeting you their highest and most important priority? I just don't get it.
Okay, like many travelers, I get bored spending so much time alone when I travel to a new place. Also, it is nice to make friends and have social experiences when traveling. While my horndog days are mostly behind me, still, it would have been nice to have the option of getting some 'attention' if the opportunity had presented itself and I'd been in the mood. So, really. You think it is safe to go to some stranger's hotel room? Really, you think someone is going to feel safe inviting you to their hotel room, when you've never even spoken? I would think in this day and time, caution would be a valued trait, not an unvalued one. I've been very lucky so far. The boys I've met during my travels have been generally nice, sexy, good boys who I was very lucky to meet and spend time together. I have boys I see in Honolulu, Hilo, San Diego and DC, some with whom I've been friends for 6 or more years at this point. Still, at some point, luck might turn against me. So, caution seems like a good idea. Don't you think?
Great postings, read them all. You come across as a nice, realistic proponents of the innate attraction between older and younger guys. Keep writing - we younger guys need to know there's great guys out there yet.
ReplyDeleteThat is most kind of you to say. One 'advantage' to being an older guys is that, through experience, we've learned a thing or two. Every new generation seems to think that their experience is completely unique. Of course, there are differences, but in many ways, as the old saying goes, 'everything old is new again'.
ReplyDelete