As the old saying goes, 'the monster you know is less scary than the one you don't.' I get it, trust me. I stayed in a relationship, one that lasted for over ten years, at least three years too long. He knew it, I knew it, yet we both stayed. In the end, the break-up was far more painful than it should have been. Looking back, we are both clearly better off. Granted, he left me for an unemployed, nelly, nearly retarded, bearish guy, who looks 10 years older than he is...but still...they've now been together nearly as long as my ex and I were and they seem very happy. They share a house my ex and I lived in for most of the time we were together, which is located only 80 feet away from the little house by the Big Lake in which I live, so it is pretty easy for me to see how happy they are together:).
Two of the boys I play with, on occasion, fit this stereotype. One, who turns 40 this year, is literally one of the sexiest men I've ever met. He is smart, sincere, is an amazing f*ck, and yet is stuck in an unhappy relationship because he worries nobody else would want him. He is, at least as far as I can tell, the brass ring: handsome, sexy, successful, sweet, hard-working. Yet, he worries that if he were to break up with his partner, he'd end up alone. Poppycock! The other boy is in his early 30's. He has, or so it seems to me, clearly had some personal and professional ups and downs. He is, and has been for a long time, a sexless relationship, because his, 'boyfriend' was willing to date him, when his life was in a total downward spiral, so he feels like he 'owes' it to his boyfriend to stay, and, of course, he worries nobody else would want him?
WTF? To me this is just like the fear most of us experienced with coming out. Back in my day, I am old, remember, coming out was a major trauma. In my case, the trauma was made even deeper because I am in the military. Yet, like nearly everybody else I've ever met, once I came out, I looked back and wondered, 'just what the hell was the big deal?'
Look, trust me. I am a Daddy, I know about this stuff. If you are in a bad relationship, get out of it! As bitter as I seem some times, and as much as I miss being in a happy relationship (like the one Sam and I shared), I am way better off being alone, than being in a bad, unsatisfying, or unhealthy relationship. And, of course, it means I am available to someone who has taken this advise and seeks a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.
At least, that is what THIS DADDY thinks.
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